Why are young men giving up on young women?

My 16 year old homeschooled son is wanting to take a girl bowling.  It will be his first real 'date'.  I struggled with what advice to give him to let her know that he likes her without coming across as 'creepy' (which is currently the most commonly used word to describe boys and men by girls and women).  I came up blank.   Even 'normal' gentlemanly behavior is now called into question as 'misogynistic'.

Then, this morning I read an excellent article about how feminism has totally destroyed how men and women interact.  The article had several F-bombs, so I'm not going to share it, but the concept was right on.  Boys and men are both checking out of the relationship business because there are no longer any 'rules' with women.  Porn is free and 'convenient' and the rules are easy to understand.  Video games are prevalent, and the rules are black and white. Both are HORRIBLY damaging and most men know it, but sadly, they don't care.  The potential harm from porn seems much less difficult to manage than a real live feministic and confusing woman.

Some girls smile and giggle when a guy opens a door or offers his arm or tells her she looks nice or compliments her eyes.  Others scowl and call him a creep.  Some ladies still understand that a man was designed by God to provide and protect.  A lot of ladies think that is a clever and convenient deception to somehow subjugate women.  Really?  Do you know what I would give to have a man provide for me and protect me?  Just about everything I have!!!!

How do we, as a society in whole, somehow differentiate between the two 'types' of women?  I do not know if I can tell Noah if it is okay to tell her she looks pretty, or if she'll throw out a 'yellow light' and accuse him of unwanted advances.  It's a horrible place to be.

Too many young girls have been convinced, by well-meaning parents, that they are truly a princess.  What a load of bunk!  They are normal everyday girls ... who are very much loved.  In my opinion, calling a girl that is both damaging and disrespectful.  You can be assured her teachers will not treat her like a princess.  The other girls at school will not defer to her.  And, in addition, she is raised with totally unreal and unfair expectations of a man.  She will want a man to be what she sees in a Disney cartoon as 'Prince Charming', and we ALL know, VERY well, that such men do not exist.  So, these girls are raised with false expectations and are consistently disappointed by the very genuine (albeit awkward) attempts by real, kind-hearted young men, who would treat her very well.

On the flip side, not too long ago, the 'B' word was a horrible terrible demeaning slam.  A woman would be crushed if someone called her that.  Today, it is somehow a badge of honor.  Girls brag about how much that word fits them.  They wear t-shirts that outline how difficult they will be to live with and how useless men are. They take Facebook quizzes about how 'witchy' they are, and post their high results with smiles and laughs.  How did we get to the point that the meaner and crankier and more difficult a woman is, somehow that makes her a better 'lady'???  Baloney!!!!

Why is it no longer tolerated, by the feminist movement, for a girl to just be a girl?  For her to WANT to get married to a decent, hard-working, non-handsome-prince-like man and have a family?  Why is she required to act like some sort of princess or witch in order to feel validated and important?

And we wonder why guys are turning to porn, video games, and solitude.

I feel SO sorry for the men, young and old, living in today's confused times.

Are You Feeding the Machine?

I heard an analogy the other day about a Coke Machine.

We walk up to a Coke machine looking for a refreshing soda.  We put in our quarters, push the button, and no soda drops out.  Then we notice the light is on indicating that it is empty. At that point, most of us push the coin return, fish out our quarters, and go find another machine.

Some people, however, push the button several more times … push it harder … then take more quarters out of their pocket and feed them into the machine hoping they will get a different result if they try again.

The Coke machine can represent many things.  Relationally, it can be love, acceptance, and affirmation.  Monetarily, it can be a dead end job.  Politically, it can be a party platform.

A healthy person realizes that when they are not getting love or acceptance or affirmation out of a broken relationship, the last thing they need to do is keep feeding it quarters and hoping for a different result.

However, some people cannot understand that if the machine is empty, it is empty.  They push the button harder, straighten their hair and put on lipstick, push the button again, resolve to work out at the gym every morning, push the button, move to the side trying to sneak up on the button, and push it again hoping that if they do something different it will give them what they long for.

All the quarters in your savings account will not help you get a soda out of an empty machine.  It will end up sucking you dry and you get nothing in return.  There isn’t anything healthy about that type of relationship.

Let’s look at this from a political standpoint.  We are repeatedly told that we have to vote for whoever the GOP ‘gives’ us to vote for.  We gripe about how the party no longer adheres to its conservative platform as we feed quarters into it EVERY election.  We continue to appease the owners of the Coke machine by refusing to use common sense, vote our conscience, hit the coin return, and GO FIND A DIFFERENT MACHINE!  We continue to feed quarters into a machine that is incapable of giving us what we need.

After every election, we blame our continued thirst on the ones who chose to not put their quarters into the empty machine.  Somehow we tell ourselves that if they, too, would have invested in the machine, maybe the return would have been different.  How much sense does that make?  None.

Folks, let’s go find a different Coke machine.  This one is empty.